Get Ready!

Today was my last day of work for a while and it was CRAZY! Non-stop bill paying, money counting, depositing, dotting “i’s” and crossing “t’s,” whatever you want to say to describe the random tasks that swept through my office in my 9 hour presence.

This was a good thing in some respects because it didn’t allow me much time to acknowledge how terrified I am to start program tomorrow.

I opted to do a partial hospitalization so I could sleep at home and not, once again, be hours away from the man I love, but I have to meet some pretty strict rules and stipulations in the next few weeks for the professionals on my team to allow me to continue down that path.

Initially, they suggested me going to the Denver Eating Disorder Clinic because apparently it is one of the best in the world, but I am a firm believer that it doesn’t matter where I am, I have to put my best foot forward and kick this thing once in for all.

I can definitely admit I needed a little extra help/support, but if I am willing to make the necessary changes at home (which I am!) then I HAVE to give it a shot, because I KNOW I am strong and can conquer this disease.

How is that for confidence, right?!

Anyway, I just wanted to stop in and say hello and fully admit the fear I have about tomorrow…the lack of treadmill usage…the foreign foods that will enter my body…and a caloric amount that makes my heart beat a million miles an hour with anxiety.

So please, wish me luck, friends.  You guys have been amazingly helpful and I cannot tell you how much I appreciate all your kind words 🙂

Happy Tuesday!!!


20 thoughts on “Get Ready!

  1. Sorry if this is imposing, but I am from Denver and there are two eating disorder centers there: the Eating Recovery Center, and the Eating Disorder Center of Denver. The second one (EDC) is terrible, I had the absolute worst experience there. I did some outpatient stuff at the Eating Recovery Center (ERC) and they were awesome. I just hope your team is referring to the ERC not the EDC. 🙂 I wish you the best. I don’t know if it was right to tell you this but when I switched from the EDC to the ERC, I promised myself I would refer people to the good one if I ever got the chance because my experience at the bad one was that bad.

    • I just wasn’t sure which one you were referring to as the Denver Eating Disorder Clinic, when I googled it, the name didn’t match up to anything exactly but was the tagline on the Eating Recovery Center’s website. I can get you more details if you want.

      • I second peacebeme’s comments, although I never actually went…but I was VERY close to going inpatient/residential at Eating Recovery Center (my therapist has sent several people there, and the program is apparently top-notch…a couple of the drs who used to run Laureate are now at ERC), and I had done a lot of research/asking around/emailing – and ERC got great reviews. I have heard bad stuff about the Eating Disorder Center (EDC) in Denver. Anyway, ultimately I was able to make good progress/pull myself out of the hole via intensive outpatient (still have about 12 pounds to gain, but have put on 14 and so am out of danger territory – yay!), so I didn’t have to be whisked away…and hopefully your PHP program will work out for ya…and you won’t need to go to Denver, either 🙂 – but just wanted to add my 2 cents since I’d done a ton of research on ERC (versus EDC). Good luck, CJ – I’m proud of you!

  2. YOU WILL NOT REGRET IT 🙂 I PROMISE! I love you and this is the best thing you could be doing for your body right now, and remember : healthy, happy, whole..

  3. I am so proud of you I am literally almost crying. Cj I just made my goal weight and although it is hard I am happier than i have ever been. Also my relationship with my husband is better than it has ever been. You will be tempted and challenged by this recovery process but do not give up. I am only an email away…

  4. When i had to leave work to take care of myself a dear friend had the best advice i got- “YOU are your job now. All day every day taking care of YOU is what you do. So work at it like you want a promotion and the boss is watching!”
    Not sure if you can relate but i am so glad to hear you will finally recieve regular professional support that will help you reach your own goals for yourself.
    Be brutally honest. Turn yourself inside out, talk about the scary stuff you wont say out loud and give it your all

  5. Pingback: MIA But Recovery Focused | Healthy, Happy, Whole

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