I am having a hard time with a few things outside my recovery, that I have definitely let impact my progress in the past.

They are stressors every adult has, I just tend to deal with them very poorly, and let things that bother me justify my destructive behaviors.

“Boo hoo, I hate this part of my life…I am not happy with how this is going…etc.”

You get the picture.

So I was venting to my mom about my current woe; definitely catastrophizing the situation to the max, and she stopped me mid sentence and said, “CJ, you create a lot of your own misery.”

Oh my gosh she is right.

I sounded really whiny and terrible and I was appalled at my complaints, because lately I have been WAY more negative than necessary, and that really isn’t part of my character.

I was pretty darn embarassed with myself after I thought about it because I don’t like being so pessimistic. It makes me feel ungrateful, unappreciative and needy, considering my life is wonderfully blessed in so many ways.

Not to mention it takes a whole heck of a lot more effort to be negative than if I could just adopt the attitude, “CJ, things aren’t exactly the way you want them at the current moment, but you have the power to make a change for the better. ”

It is a proven fact that if you start the morning with a positive outlook, the tone of the day will be much more productive…and happy.

How many times have you gone into work thinking, “Wow these next 8 hours are going to take forever…this week is going so slowly….”

And then those things become your reality, right?!

Well I am approaching today and this week differently, because it has been FAR FAR too long since I have woken up and actually smelled the roses.

Remember my mantra of PTG?!

As great of a habit as that was, it has sadly been put to the wayside in my last few weeks of being a grump.

But like I said, I have the power to make a change and right now I am going to share with all of you that I am proud of the fact that I have been listening to my body and been much better at ignoring the detrimental comments of others.

I am extremely thankful for the new friends and faces that have come into my life and made such a wonderful impact.

And I am GOING TO (I changed Goal to GOING TO so I JUST DO IT πŸ˜‰ ) continue to step out of my comfort zone in ALL avenues of my life; including with fear foods, emotional expression, and asking for what I need.

What is your PTG this Monday? If you take three seconds to think about it, your day/week might just get off on the right foot πŸ™‚


5 thoughts on “GRUMP Is NOT The G In PTG

  1. I totally agree with you about this! I do this a lot with food, too. “Oh, I don’t want to eat that because I know I’ll feel soooo guilty after.” Or, “The only way for me to get anxiety relief is through exercise.” Well, then I try journaling or doing art, but because I have already stated that the only thing that will help is exercise, those tools don’t work! Darn.

    I am Proud of myself for meeting a friend for lunch on Saturday even though I had a lot to do and it was at a “scary” restaurant. I feel good that I didn’t allow ED to get in the way of my relationship.

    I am Thankful that my mom helped me buy stuff for when I move out next month! Woohoo! New couch and dining table! πŸ™‚

    My Goal is to not take my mom’s crankiness personally. She’s having some physical pain and has been snippy with me, so I’m going to work on letting it go.

  2. That is definitely something I myself need to work on as well, but have noticed that recovery and everything else in life seems to go the same way. If I’m doing well in recovery, then overall, there are more positives in my life (or at least I don’t dwell on the negatives like I would have before!). I think that’s what’s so hard about EDs is that they’re so emotionally and mentally interwoven and complex. I tend to fall in the trap of thinking “Well, today sucked, so what’s the point because my whole LIFE is going to suck?” <– Clearly, that's a little dramatic! But you can see how thinking like that can easily just put you in a hole and drive you down deeper and just make things so much worse than they really are!

    I'm glad your mom made that comment though because I can see it's helped you put things in perspective! My mom does the same to me all the time πŸ˜‰

    • Ahhh! that hole is like a really strong vaccum that is relentless in its pursuit to keep you down! I hate it, but that is such a good analogy you provided! Sometimes moms do know best, even though I hate admitting that!

  3. Pingback: WIAW: Make Friends With The Food | Healthy, Happy, Whole

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