A few days ago my mom and sister watched the Demi Lovato special “Stay Strong.”
My mom then text me and suggested it might be a good thing for me to see.
I had never even heard of it, and kind of forgot my mom’s idea until Ryan and I were catching up on our DVR and the show appeared on the list.
As we were deciding what the next program on our schedule would be, he proposed we watch the hour-long documentary.
I was surprised by the show; very pleasantly surprised, because although I have always liked Demi (hello I grew up a Disney Channel freak! Camp Rock, anyone?!) I haven’t really followed her lately other than catching a glimpse of the headlines saying she went to rehab., was having a difficult times, etc.
Just a few minutes into the program I felt connected.
Although we have some different issues, the feelings behind them are very much the same; pressure, never feeling good enough, constant worry and anxiety about almost everything….her demons were very similar to mine.
I am sad for her, that she has to face the distortions and irrational beliefs about herself as a person, but I could completely relate.
Of course everyone has varying roots causing some of the negative thoughts, but it does seem that there are commonalities within the community of those who struggle.
And aside from the kinship I felt with a celebrity I will never ever meet, I also got hope; Ryan just kept saying, “If she can do it, you can do it! YOU CAN DO THIS!”
It was not only Demi who provided the inspiration. At one point, a young female met the singer/actress at her concert and told her how the renewed confidence Demi portrayed, helped her live without wearing a wig.
They didn’t go into much detail about the girl’s situation, but I remember when my aunt was going through a lot of chemotherapy, she lost her hair and wore hairpieces to cover being bald.
I can imagine it would be hard as a woman to lose an attribute that helps demonstrate femininity, so this girl, who totally rocked the hairless look by the way, was so brave to me.
I believe everyone has days where they don’t feel their best, don’t think they are the most beautiful person on the planet, or are self-conscious about one thing or another, but that doesn’t cause them to think they are a complete and utterly horrible people.
It is the way I interpret my lack of confidence, and how I let it affect me that has been killing me for so long.
Like I said Friday, it is time to fake it ‘till I make it.
If that means I have to physically write out a list of positive things about myself, then I guess I’ll do it.
If I have to start with a “eh, you aren’t so bad,” and work up to “you are a beautiful person inside and out,” then I guess I’ll take it.
I need to stay strong, because if others, who have stuck by me for many years, still have confidence that my recovery is possible, then why shouldn’t I?
I have confidence in myself, and so should you. If she can do it, WE CAN DO IT